I’m too hot (hot damn), uh
Call the police and the fireman
I’m too hot (hot damn)
Make a dragon wanna retire, man
I’m too hot (hot damn)
Say my name, you know who I am
I’m too hot (hot damn)
And my band ’bout that money, break it down
Girls, hit your hallelujah (ooh)
Girls, hit your hallelujah (ooh)
Girls, hit your hallelujah (ooh)
‘Cause uptown funk gon’ give it to you (ooh)
(‘Cause uptown funk gon’ give it to you)
‘Cause uptown funk gon’ give it to you
Saturday night, and we in the spot
Don’t believe me, just watch, come on!

1 beer, 2 beer, 3 beer, 4!
Day light come and I’m sleeping on the floor
Day light come and I’m sleeping on the floor

In the store, There’s a teddy, Little Straps, Like spaghetti, They hold me so tight, Like handcuffs at night, Walkin’ round in women’s underwear.

In the office there’s a guy named Melvin, He pretends that I am Murphy Brown, He’ll say are you ready, I’ll say no man, Let’s wait until the wife is out of town.

Later on, If you wanna, We can dress, Like Madonna. Put on some eyeshade, And join the parade, Walkin’ round in women’s underwear.

You’re as cold as ice
You’re willing to sacrifice your butt
You never whistled twice
Someday you’ll pay the price on snow

You fucked up on trail
We’ve called you in for crimes
Pull down your shorts and show us your behind
You never found marks
You got lost on the way
Get ready to drink when you head us say

Down down down down down down down…

(Chorus)
Moose, moose, I love a moose,
I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.
My life has been merry, my women been loose,
But nothing compares to the love of a moose.

Now when I’m in need of a very good lay,
I go to my closet and get me some hay.
I go to my window and spread it around.
‘Cause moose always come when there’s hay on the ground.

(Chorus)
Moose, moose, I love a moose,
I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.
My life has been merry, my women been loose,
But nothing compares to the love of a moose.

Gorillas are all right on Saturday night,
Lions and tigers, they put up a fight.
But it’s just not the same when you slam that caboose,
As the feeling you get when you’re humping with a moose.

(Chorus)

I’ve done it with beasties with long flowing hair,
I’d do it with snakes if their fangs were not there.
I’ve done it with walrus, a monkey, and goose,
But it’s just not the same when you screw with a moose.

(Chorus)

I’ve fought many battles on fields, and on Farms
I’ve had many women in beds, and in barns
Some men serve Odin, and some men serve Zeus
but you’ve never known service, til you’ve serviced a moose

(Chorus)

Now that I am old and advanced in my years,
I look back on my life and shed me no tears.
As I sit in my chair with my glass of Matheus,
Playing Hide-The-Salami with Melba the Moose.

(Chorus)