Oklahoma

Oklahoma!
where the beer and water taste the same
it’s three point two, but hey! f*** you
we’ll drink twice as much so don’t complain Oklahoma!
where my harriette and I
lay trail with chalk
and see small cocks
As we watch nice titties bouncing by
‘Cause we know we belong to the land
And the Wee Hee will drink ’til we can’t stand
So when I saaay!
Down! Down, down, down, down, down, down!
We know you’re saying, you’re f***ing drunk
Oklahoma! Oklahoma!
O! – K! – L! – A! – H! – O! – M! – A!
Oklahoma! ok…

Alternative version, with the death of near beer in OK:

Oklahoma!
Where the beer’s no longer three point two
And now you may scoff
But hey, fuck off!
We’ll still drink twice as much as you!
Oklahoma!
where my harriette and I
lay trail with chalk
and see small cocks
As we watch nice titties bouncing by
‘Cause we know we belong to the land
And the Wee Hee will drink ’til we can’t stand
So when I saaay!
Down! Down, down, down, down, down, down!
We know you’re saying, you’re f***ing drunk
Oklahoma! Oklahoma!
O! – K! – L! – A! – H! – O! – M! – A!
Oklahoma! ok…

Oh Sir Jasper

She wears a silk and nightie in the summer when it’s hot
She wears her woolen jammies in the winter when it’s not
Sometimes in the springtime and always in the fall she lays between the Lily white sheets with nothing on at all

Chorus:
Oh Sir Jasper do not touch me
Oh Sir Jasper do not touch me
Oh Sir Jasper do not touch me
As she lay between the Lily white sheets with nothing on at all

2nd chorus:
Oh Sir Jasper do not touch
Oh Sir Jasper do not touch
Oh so Gasper do not touch
As she lay between the Lily white sheets with nothing on it all

3rd: oh Sir Jasper do
4th: oh Sir Jasper
5th: oh Sir
6th: (women only moaning) Ohhhhh
Has she lay between the Lily white sheets with nothing on at all

Farts in A Bottle

If i could save farts in a bottle,
The first thing that I’d like to do,
Is to save every fart till eternity passes away,
and then share them with you…