Yogi Bear

FIRST VERSE:
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi,
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi Bear.

FIRST CHORUS:
Yogi, Yogi Bear,
Yogi, Yogi Bear,
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi Bear.

SAMPLE VERSE:
Yogi has a little friend,
Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo,
Yogi has a little friend,
Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo Bear!

SAMPLE CHORUS:
Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo Bear,
Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo Bear,
Yogi has a little friend,
Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo Bear

ADDITIONAL VERSES::

Boo-Boo has a girlfriend,
Cyndi, Cyndi,
Boo-Boo has a girlfriend,
Cyndi, Cyndi Bear

Cyndi has a shaven snatch,
Grizzly, Grizzly,
Cyndi has a shaven snatch,
Grizzly, Grizzly Bear

Cyndi likes it on the ice,
Polar, Polar,
Cyndi likes it on the ice,
Polar, Polar Bear!

Cyndi missed her period,
Pregnant, Pregnant,
Cyndi missed her period,
Pregnant, Pregnant Bear!

Yogi has a girlfriend,
Suzi, Suzi,
Yogi has a girlfriend,
Suzi, Suzi Bear!

Suzi doesn’t wash her snatch,
Gummy, Gummy,
Suzi doesn’t wash her snatch,
Gummy, Gummy Bear!

Cyndi wears lingerie,
Teddy, Teddy,
Cyndi wears lingerie,
Teddy, Teddy Bear!

Suzi likes it up the rear,
Dirty, Dirty,
Suzi likes it up the rear,
Dirty, Dirty Bear!

Suzi she has great big tits,
More than, More than,
Suzi she has great big tits,
More than, More than I can bear

Yogi didn’t use a condom,
Daddy, Daddy,
Yogi didn’t use a condom,
Daddy, Daddy Bear

Boo-Boo likes it upside down,
Koala, Koala,
Boo-Boo likes it upside down,
Koala’s not a Bear!

Boo-Boo has a twelve-inch cock,
Black Bear, Black Bear,
Boo-Boo’s only three feet tall,
Lucky, Lucky,
Yogi’s a lucky bear

Boo-Boo takes it up the butt,
Gay, Gay,
Boo-Boo takes it up the butt,
Gay, Gay Bear!

Yogi didn’t wipe his butt,
Brown, Brown,
Yogi didn’t wipe his butt,
Brown, Brown Bear!

Boo-Boo likes both black and white,
Panda, Panda,
Boo-Boo likes both black and white,
Panda, Panda Bear!

Yogi got a case of crabs,
Itchy, Itchy,
Yogi got a case of crabs,
Itchy, Itchy!

Yogi’s got an M-16,
Right to, Right to,
Yogi’s got an M-16,
Right to, Right to Bear!

Cyndi and Suzie are making out,
Klondike, Klondike,
Cyndi and Suzie are making out,
Klondike, Klondike Bear!

Suzie’s fucking vegetables,
Cucum, Cucum,
Suzie’s fucking vegetables,
Cucum, Cucum Bear!

Yogi hates the Cardinals,
Cubbie, Cubbie,
Yogi hates the Cardinals,
Cubbie, Cubbie Bear!

Boo-Boo hates the Packers,
Chicago, Chicago,
Boo-Boo hates the Packers,
Chicago, Chicago Bear!

U-G-L-Y

U-G-L-Y, you ain’t got no alibi,
You ugly, you ugly, yeah, yeah, you ugly!

Optional Verses:

M-O-M-M-A, she’s the one who made you that way,
Your momma, your momma, your momma says you ugly!
D-A-D-D-Y, you don’t even know that guy,
Your daddy, your daddy, your daddy thinks you’re ugly!
U-N-C-L-E, that who your real dad be,
Your uncle, your uncle, your uncle thinks your ugly!
C-O-U-S-I-N, that is who you’re marryin’,
Your cousin, your cousin, your cousin thinks you’re ugly!
I-N-B-R-E-D, that is what your kids will be,
They’re inbred, they’re inbred, your kids think you’re ugly!
C-U-T-E, you wish you were cute like me,
I’m cute, I’m cute, I’m really f*cking cute!

No! No! No!

No! No! No!
Bad! Bad! Bad!
Down! Down! Down!

No Balls at all

__________, has only got one ball,
__________, has two but very small,
__________, has something similar,
But these mother fuckers have no balls at all.

My name is Jack

My name is Jack (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
I’m a necrophiliac (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
I fuck dead women (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
And I fill ’em full of jism (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah).
I get frustrated (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
When they’re cremated (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
Cause try as I must (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
I can’t fuck dust!

Other versions:

My name is Gus
I’m incestuous
I fucked my mother
And buggered my brother
But when they die
I will not cry
Cuz just like Jack
I’m a necrophiliac

My name is Kyle
I’m a pedophile
I fuck little boys
I get ’em with toys
If I have a son
I’ll be much fun
Cause just like Gus
I’m incestuous

My name is Nick
I’m a narcoleptic
I … ZZZZZZZzzzzzz

Meet the Hashers

Hashers, meet the hashers,
We’re the biggest drunks in history,
From the town of ________,
We’re the leaders in debauchery,
Half-minds, trailing shaggy through the years,
Watching us as we down a lot of beers.

Here’s to brother hasher

Here’s to brother hasher,
Bother hasher, brother hasher,
Here’s to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.

He’s happy, he’s jolly,
He’s fucked up by golly,
Here’s to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.

So drink motherfucker,
Drink motherfucker,
Drink motherfucker,
Drink motherfucker,

Here’s to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.

Notes: Every reference to “brother hasher” can be changed to “sister hasher”

Heineken, Schmeinekin!

Heineken, Schmeinekin!
Fuck that shit!
Pabst Blue Ribbon!

He’s a Hasher, He’s ok!

To the tune of The Lumberjack Song by Monty Python.

He’s a hasher, he’s okay,
He works all day, comes out to play,
He drinks it down without complaint,
Or he wears it well.
Drink it! Wear it!
Drink it! Wear it!
Wear it! Wear it! Wear it!

Notes: The “Drink it! Wear It!” lines are chanted by the circle rather than the usual “Down, down, down.”