Uncategorized
And so this is hashmas
And a happy new year
Get drunk in a punch up
And get socked in the ear.
And so this is hashmas
With a wink and a leer
Let’s eat too much turkey
And drink lots of beer.
And so this is hashmas
No need to look glum
You’ll drink too much whisky
And fall on your bum.
Uncategorized
Jingle Balls, jingle balls, jingle all the way
Oh what fun it is to run around dressed up this way
Jingle Balls, jingle balls, jingle all the way
Oh what fun it is to run around looking silly on Christmas Day
Dashing round the block, wearing silly hats
One hand on your bits to give yourself more slack
Bouncing up and down as we run to and fro
We’ll jingle with our funny bits, everywhere we go.
Uncategorized
Tis the season to be greedy Tra-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la
Eat until you feel quite seedy Tra-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la
Lots of beer and food and jollies Tra-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la
In the morning you’ll be sorry Tra-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la
Uncategorized
We wish you a drunken Christmas
We wish you a drunken Christmas
We wish you a drunken Christmas
And a case of cold beer.
Glad tidings we bring
To you and your kin
Glad tidings for Christmas
And a case of cold beer!
Uncategorized
I’ve been a short-cutter for many a year
And I’ve spent all my money on hash runs and beer
But now I’m reforming, my name to restore
And I never will be a short-cutter no more.
So it’s no, nae, never
No never no more
Will I be a short-cutter, no never, no more
Uncategorized
Slack bladder, slack bladder
You ran upon a hash.
Slack bladder, slack bladder
And had to have a slash!
Offensive
There’s a pest in my home, that’s the bane of my life
He leaves UP the toilet seat night after night
Next week I am going to give him a fright
The seat will be up when he gets there!
Chorus:-
There’s nothing worse than to live with a pest
Gets on my nerves until I need a rest
Even in bed, he’s annoying at best,
And that’s the sad bit of my story.
I’m cooking and cleaning long hours every day
And washing his shirts till the grey’s gone away.
When the gra-ass needs cutting I know he will say Goodbye I am off to the Golf Club!
Chorus
I hold down a job, drive the kids near and far
While he has a drink with his friends in the bar.
And then he complains that I don’t wash the car, I really don’t know how I stand it!
Chorus
You may be asking what happens in bed
Not half enough is what most ladies said!
Most of the time he is snoring instead,
I think something’s got at his hormones!
Chorus
Unless I’ve a headache and just cannot shake it
When sex is on offer I always will take it,
But he goes so fast that I sometimes fake it
Where are the classes in foreplay?
Chorus
Oh a pest in the house, when he sits by the fire
Cutting his toenails just kills all desire
And so does the belly he calls his spare tyre.
Next week I am getting a lodger.
Uncategorized
I need a lover, mother.
No not my brother, mother, I need a sheep to keep me warm through the night!
Bah-bah- bah- bah etc
Uncategorized
Oh my love is like a red, red wine
That’s newly poured in glass.
Oh my love is like a dark craft beer
That down my throat will pass.
So fair art thou, O demon drink
So great in love am I
That I will down far, far too much
Then throw up in the sink!
Uncategorized
Not far from Auld Reekie
All covered in mud
I went on a hash run
I was in the skud
The polis came runnin’
But couldnae catch me
They were right scunnered
But I am still free
OnOn to the beer check
To down a good dram
I do love my hashing
But now I must scram!